When there is a stinky sock on your bed, refuse to rest until the human slave has disposed of it. If your human is as useless as mine, you will have to wait an extremely long time.
After more than a week in the wilderness without a computer, the only photos I can find on the human's stupid camera are of THIS:
Baby Mao's stinky poo prints!! SO WHERE EXACTLY ARE THE PHOTOS OF ME???????
YOURS, IRATE AND SHOUTING VERY LOUDLY
Human, in answer to your questions:
Yes. I did do a huge royal dump on your bed today. No, I am not going to apologise.
I am fed up with your laziness in cleaning out the litter tray. In fact, I feel strongly that one should have His very own litter tray - I detest sharing with stinky Mao.
Yes, I am naughty and no, I cant promise I won't do it again.
Yours, pleased with oneself
Human, I do not appreciate having my royal self photographed by you, with you.
And honestly, you need to stop trying to kiss me, this instant. I will never, EVER kiss you back, so stop trying.
Yours, disgusted as usual
HRH Yao-Lin xx
| My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is: |
Grand Duke Yao-lin the Bloody of Brompton Underfoot
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