Wednesday, 5 November 2008

A Meme on Saturday

Darling Hendrix tagged me for a meme AGES ago. As the fat human has been spending all of her time on facebook, I have been unable to complete said meme until now.

Without further delay:

1. Where is your cell phone? - In the UK we call them mobile phones. Sadly, I do not own one. The human has one on which she spends hours playing bejewled. This amuses her peanut sized brain and stops her from bothering me, so I can't really complain.

2. Where is the husband? - No, I don't have a husband. Nor do I have a wife. In fact, I have very little in the way of creature comforts and spend my days lonely and bereft of attention.

3. Your hair color? - I am a seal point siamese. The human aunt calls me Thornton as in 'Thornton's chocolates'. I readily respond with a swipe. She KNOWS my real name but sadly is as mentally challenged as the human slave. *sigh*

4. Your mother? - Lives in a palace on the other side of the island. I can't believe she let me move to a hovel at only a few weeks old. I will never, ever forgive her. Ever.

5. Your father? - Apparently, he was a stud. I can't say I'm surprised. Like father liek son!

6. Your favorite thing? - Steak. Beating up Baby Mao.

7. Your dream last night? I dreamt that Obama adopted a royal siamese prince to take to the white house instead of a stupid puppy. *sigh*

8. Your dream/goal? - To escape this hovel and find my real royal roots. I know I have family and an abundance of human slaves out there somewhere, I just have to find them.

9. The room you're in? - I spend my days asleep in the airing cupboard. This hovel is freezing and the airing cupboard is the only place in which I can find warmth.

10. Your hobby? - I am too depressed to have hobbies. Apart from comfort eating, sleeping and beating baby Mao.

11. Your fear? - That I am stuck with my human slave until the end of my miserable life. Can you imagine? Cheap cat food, no heat, the constant stench of baby Mao...forever....*shudder*

12. Where do you want to be in 6 years? - Living in the lap of luxury at Daisy's house. Now THERE's a human that KNOWS how to treat a feline.

13. Where were you last night? - I threw a temper tantrum because the human slave's niece has come to stay. I started by attacking her UGG boots then moved onto the air bed so that it deflated as soon as she slept on it. Ha!

14. What you're not? - Spoiled. I get new toys only once a month. I am forced to share a double bed with the human slave and stinky mao. I am fed steak only once in a blue moon. I suffer. Oh yes, I suffer.

15. One of your wish-list items? - A new, well trained human slave who waits on me paw and foot 24/7. Is that too much to ask?

16. Where you grew up? - In a hovel.*sniff*

17. The last thing you did? - Swiped at the human for kissing me on the head.

18. What are you wearing? - A cheap collar because the human is too tight to buy me an expensive one. It is NOT my fault I keep losing them is it!

19. Your TV? - I am forced to sit through endless repeats of Friends and Scrubs.

20. Your pet? - The human slave if she counts.

21. Your computer? - Dell.

22. Your mood? - What about it? Wouldn't you be in a bad mood if you had my life? Hmm?

23. Missing someone? - I carry my burdens alone and miss no-one.

24. Your car? - The human has a matchbox on wheels and I am forced to travel in it on the occasions I have to visit the vet. It is highly embarrassing.

25. Something you're not wearing? - The pumpkin outfit.

26. Favorite store? - Pets at Home.

27. Your summer? - At least it is warm. I must be grateful for small mercies.

28. Love someone? - Myself. Someone has to. *sniff*

29. Your favorite color? - Purple.

30. When is the last time you laughed? - When I punctured the air bed. Mwa ha ha!

31. Last time you cried? - I'm always crying. Wouldn't you?

I'd like to tag:

Mr Echo
The Meezers

Ta ta for now *sniff*

HRH Yao-Lin


Eric and Flynn said...

Poor Yao-lin. Our hearts break for your tragic life.

Everycat said...

My human is making comments about playing the tiniest violin ever. But I see how you suffer Yao-lin.

Whicky Wuudler et al

ZOOLATRY said...

We are forced to agree with Everycat about the "tiny violin". Perhaps however you could achieve some small improvement in your life (and fame?) if you went on the comedy circuit... your stand up routines are rather good to say the least.

Cory said...

I couldn't figure out what my mom was doing with her fingers until I read what the others that's what a tiny violin looks like! Then she cried...then laughed! I don't think she was serious about the crying part. We totally agree with you that Obama needs to take a Meezer to the White House to keep the puppy in line.

Daisy said...

Yao-Lin, we will begin building the addition to our house, so everything will be ready for your arrival in 6 years!

Lux said...

Your answers practically make me weep for you, Yao-Lin. I wonder how you keep going on ... :-/

Anonymous said...

Yao-lin! Daisy is building you an addition JUST FOR YOU!? Your suffering finally has an expiration date!

Sunny's Mommy said...

Poor Yao Lin. I'm sorry for your suffering. As always. You suffer so :( But I have to say your favorite things and hobbies are wonderful :-D

Cheysuli and gemini said...

oh Yao-lin I am sobbing. Sobbing I tell you.

I think Obama needs a fleet of meezers to show him how to run the White House properly.

Leslie said...

There there our little teddy bear.


Yao-lin! Yao-lin - I live under the domination of a fat black and white Great White Pointer shark cat.

Hugs from Pyewacket. X

Parker said...

Such a cross to bear. It makes me weep...

Sabrina, Sam and Simon said...

Yao-Lin, please teleport over to join our Meezer pile until Daisy finishes the addition to her home for you! But you'd have to suffer some with our Momma wanting to kiss you all of the time ... hee hee!
Purrs and headbutts,
Sabrina, Sam and Simon

Sophia said...

I'm pretty sure your human counts as a pet. Mine does.

Ramses said...

I see you're suffering just like me... Yes, I know My Mummy's well trained and it's only occasional suffering I must endure, but it comes as a shock to the system and I can't cope! I wanna fuss NOW after all...

Our lives are tragic I fear Yao-lin... :(

The Cat Realm said...

Ya0-Lin - after reading this horrible account of your life we are ready to sign petitions, start revolutions, do campaigns for getting you OUT OF THERE and into a better place, like Buckingham Palace, or Versailles, or something with better personal!!!!
Sending purrs of support!
Mrs. OZ, Tintin and Karl