Thursday, 6 March 2008

Thursday Thirteen

My human slave is stupid. Fact. With that in mind, please take a moment to reflect on the following:

Thirteen Stupid Things My Human Slave Has Said This Week:

1. "How on earth did those paw prints get all over the wall?"

2. "Yao-Lin, did you puke on my work shoes?".

3. "Please, Yao-Lin, I can't give you all of my attention when I am cooking your dinner. It's actually quite dangerous!".

4. "Please get off my pillow, cats. I can't breath with both your a*ses in my face".

5. "Please, cats, don't jump on my tummy when I am fast asleep. It really hurts me when I get winded"!

6. "Please, Baby Mao, stop climbing up the curtains. You've already ripped them and I don't think they will last much longer".

7. "Do I have to share my breakfast with you everyday Yao-Lin?"

8. "WHY are you bunnykicking my leg, Yao-Lin? I wasn't even doing anything to annoy you!"

9. "I cannot believe Derren Brown is gay. I am devastated. I really truly thought he was the One. He was supposed to meet me at one of his gigs and instantly fall in love with me. FOR THE LOVE OF BAST, WHY???"

10. "Come and give Mummy a cuddle, Yao-Lin, she's feeling fragile after hearing the tragic news about Derren."

11."Yao-Lin - since when do you like eating pasta drizzled with olive oil? I thought this was the one meal I could enjoy all to myself."

12. "There's a special offer on cooked chicken but I don't think the cats could eat more than one."

13. "Yao-Lin, was it you who left a trail of poo prints all over my clean laundry?".

See what I mean? I live with a complete idiot.

Ta ta for now

HRH Yao-Lin xx


topcatrules said...

Yao-lin! Yao-lin!
Have you got your sulky face now? Can I see? Can I? Huh?
Hey Yao-lin, Trixie jumped on mom's tummy so hard last night mom yelled some really bad words.

Kellie The Orange Cat said...

Yao-lin, I don't know how you carry on! Your life is so hard having an incompetent bean.

She actually thought it was you that left the poo prints on the laundry?! Has she not seen Baby Mao prancing around the house leaving poo prints before?

Sigh, I feel for you.

Diamond Emerald-Eyes said...

Truly. If she can't figure out who left the paw prints all over her clean laundry, he's a moron.

And I don't know how you can stand it. Judging from those comments she sees you as nothing more than a couple of pets she picked up along the way. She has NO clue who is the slave in this relationship. I don't know what to tell you Yao-Lin. However, you can always pop down to Black Cat Pub and pick up a good meal if you are hungry.

Kaze, Latte, & Chase said...

Yup, me too. Complete idiots. Of course she should give you all of her attention even when cooking. And um....pillows are meant for lying on!


Daisy said...

My Mommie is a very big dummy, too. It is hard to put up with sometimes.

Lux said...

Tsk tsk. Hang in there, Yao-Lin!

Artsy Catsy said...

Yao-lin, thank you for pointing all this out to me. Obviously my mom is imitating your mom, because I hear these same doofus comments all the time!


Cheysuli and gemini said...

Ah Yao-lin it is tough to have a human slave isn't it?

Chairman Mao said...

Oh wowie kazowie, my momma's laffin so hard, but I kompletely sympathyze with you, Yao-lin. My beans can be furry dense, too. It must be a hooman thing.

Kittyhugs and purrs from MaoMao!

Samantha & Tigger said...

Poor Yao-lin, what you have to go through with your human slave!! But it seems like you give her a bit of bother, too! (hehehehe)
Your FL furiends,

Zippy, Sadie and Speedy said...

Yes, most beans is idiots. If it weren't fur der apposable thumbs dey would be almost useless...dey is kinda warm tho.

michico*Adan said...

Oah Yao-Lin
I think your mommy is really trying~~~ She is very good already~~~~~
Thank god you don't live with my bean, or she might be let you faint!

Ramses said...

My goodness how do you put up with it? My Mummy moans when I bring bikky to bed and eat it at 3am... It's dreadful! Does she want me to feel a bit hungry or what?!

Oh and to make you laugh I've got video of Isis belly moving to show you! ;)

The Furry Fighter said...

Derren Brown is gay? of all the magicians I didn't suspect him of being gay!

Yao-Lin, atleast your Bean has helped you blog...mind you all those other things you have to deal DO you cope my handsome prince?

Queen Snickers and Empress said...

Bean! Mine kept grabbing my paws last night and cover my eyes with them. She said it was cute! Idiot! ~Queen Snickers

Sunny's Mommy said...

I am so sorry, Yao Lin. She is truly dense. I hope she appreciates how lucky she is to have you.