*Yawn*

Greetings my inferior subjects. Allow me to introduce myself.

I am a royal siamese prince who is waited on paw and foot by my adoring human slave. I live on the Isle of Wight which is adequate, if a little quiet for my delectable tastes.

I enjoy eating, sleeping, eating, sleeping and being fussed over (when I am in the mood). If you wish to befriend me, there are a few simple rules which, if you follow, will allow us to gain somewhat of a rapport.

Rules

1. Do not approach me. I will approach you if I am interested. Otherwise I will simply ignore you.

2. Do not disturb me when I am eating. This is my most pleasurable of pursuits and I will not tolerate being bothered whilst I am engaged in this.

3. Do not assume that I am cuddly just because I have a huge tummy. I gained my girth through months of eating and it is neither a measure of my cuddliness nor a sign of cuteness. I am a royal prince.

4. Do not disturb my human slave whilst she is cooking my dinner. Food is priority over conversation.

5. Do not fuss over my little (inferior) brother whilst in my presence. To do so will only result in a jealous display of aggression on my part. I kid you not.

6. If I lay on your lap with my belly exposed, I wish for it to be rubbed. I will bite you when I have had enough.

7. Follow each of the above rules. To do otherwise will displease me greatly and, as any human slave to a siamese will know, a displeased siamese is not something to trifle with.

*Yawn* I must retire now but I will endeavour to update my blog on a regular basis. Ta ta for now.

Yao-Lin xxxxxx