Sunday 27 May 2007

Confessions on Sunday (Meme)

I have been tagged by both Chairman Mao and Marie the Defender! Thank you guys for tagging me, it goes without saying: any opportunity to talk about myself is a great opportunity!

The rules are simple: Confess as many things as you like and then tag as many cats as you like.

So, without further delay, here are my confessions. If you are short of time, I would leave now. I have a feeling the list is going to be l-o-n-g!


Yao-Lin's Confessions


1. I recently heard the term ' King of the Universe' and I am considering adopting it. I would love to be King of the Universe!


2. I go on about Baby Mao being a brat but truthfully, I am equally as brattish in my behaviour and demands. I am sure you are surprised by this confession!


3. I get really jealous when Mao gets attention, from either cats or humans. I think everyone should worship ME alone.


4. When visitors attend my palace, I don't hesitate to nip at them if I don't like the way they look or smell.


5. I love toothpaste. Human toothpaste. If my slave has some on her hand or on her mouth I will lick it off at the same time as purring incessantly.


6. I helped Mao defrost the freezer. I was a little surprised at the amount of water everywhere! I didn't feel guilty though.


7. I actually prefer my male slave over my female slave, even though my female slave attends to my every whim. I think I may be a bit sexist.


8. I felt threatened by Baby Mao when he first came to live with me. Then when I saw how tiny he was, I just felt really really annoyed.


9. The female slave bought a book entitled ' Testing your Cat's IQ'. Mao actually scored higher than I did! I think the test was rigged to make stinky Mao feel better.

10. Sometimes I sniff Mao's hoo-ha's and pull a really weird face. I don't know why I do this. He doesn't even have any hoo-ha's!


11. I started blogging after I met Skeezix. His was the first cat blog I ever read and I was hugely impressed. Then I realised that I could use a blog to send the message of my Greatness across the world. I think it was fate!

12. I have previously walked into next door's house as though I own it. I have been known to growl at the occupants, especially when they are in their garden. I think it is MY garden.


13. I was traumatised for a week after having my hoo-ha-ectomy. My human thought she would have to take me back to the vet. I became very depressed and wouldn't eat. I feel OK now but I still haven't quite forgiven the humans .


14. I force my human to carry me to my food bowl. All I have to do is howl at her and she comes running, picks me up and places me next to my food.


15. It has taken me over a year to get my slaves as well trained as they are and they STILL make mistakes!


16. As a result of 15, I regard my humans with disdain most of the time. I wish I could test their IQ's and then exchange them for some humans with a higher score.


17. I trashed my human ' Grandmother's house. I was forced to stay there for two weeks last summer and I set about being the most badly behaved cat in history. I wrecked her expensive curtains, knocked down all of the ornaments, tried to kill her budgie, knocked my treats all over the floor, kicked litter all over the carpet, howled all the way through the night and at one point, stole a Macdonalds Burger right from out of her hand. I am not allowed to stay there anymore. Mission accomplished!


Right, I am going to tag:

Jinx

Zippy, Sadie and Speedy

The Meezers

Kaze, Latte and Chase

Oh, and baby Mao wants me to tag Kaia.

23 comments:

Boo said...

Lol ^^
I'm writing my confessions now

Lol...how did mao score higher than you? I bet you score higher than every human!
Jinx x

Dragonheart, Merlin, Devi, and Chloe said...

Oh my Yao-lin! The description of your behaviour at your grandmother's house reminds me of the evil Siamese cats in "The Lady and The Tramp." I'm sure that movie is why so many people think Siamese cats are mean - every Meezer my mom has ever met has been a wonderful, friendly cat.

The IQ test must have been rigged.

Daisy said...

Hahahahahahah! Yao-lin, you are a very naughty boy! But I think you might be King of the Universe.

That was a good scientific experiment you did with the freezer. And see, you learned some important things.

I think Dragonheart is right; the IQ test must have been rigged.

Unknown said...

Yao AND Mao! Mom is gonna help Kaia with the meme this evening...so stay tuned!!!

Parker said...

You are using your Jacobsen's Organ when you sniff Mao's butt. That's why you make the face you do! It's a normal kitty thing.
You actually snached a burger out of a human hand? Good on 'ya!

mister jeter harris, hizself said...

i am laffin an laffin yao-lin!
duz yer grammie even talk to u anymor?
jus wunderin!
luv--yer grate frend--jh

Donny and Marie and Casey said...

Wow Yao-Lin!! You are amazingly and cleverly naughty! I am furiously taking notes about how to be "badder". I esp love how you have train your humans to do your every whim. Can you teach me please???

Pawesome meme!

Donny and Marie and Casey said...

PS. We are so glad we have found another Doctor Who fan!!! My mommy loves both Doctors, but prefers Chris Ecclestone too. Rose was pawesome too!

Tara said...

My hero!

Tara

snowforest said...

u r so naughty!!

Zippy, Sadie, Speedy and M'Gee said...

Whoa, dood, I'm surprised yoor gramma din't send yoo to da sawsaje faktory! We lerned dat if we are nice, and dat duzent meen we don't do nawty stuff, we get a lot more. The sekrit is to look furry sad when yoo do nawty stuff, works effury time!

Anonymous said...

#17--Impressive!

MaoMao said...

hehehehe, I can't quit laffin'! What a superduper list. And toofpaste, hmmm, whatta interesting idea!

Readin' about your stay at your gramma's cracked me up. I think you and me would get along really really good. And y'know what, I'm the biggest butt-sniffin' kitty in this house, too, I'm alwayz tryin' to sniff everykitty's butt. It's fun!

Kittyhugs and purrs from MaoMao!

Memories of Eric and Flynn said...

Haha Yao-lin, yoo are the baddest cat we know. Wish we could haf watched yoo at yer Gramma's. We haf nefurr tried eating toofpaste, but as soon as we hear the Bean's brushes start buzzing, we bofe run to watch.

Artsy Catsy said...

Yao-lin, I think you and I have much in common. I, too, what what I want when I want it ... or something's gonna get wrecked! I dunno about that toothpaste thing, though. Yuck!

Rocky

DK & The Fluffies said...

Oh my... such a list - I knew I liked you for some reason! Purrs!

Samantha & Mom said...

Did you really do all those things? It's nice for you to fess up. I think you must be smarter, how could you do all those things otherwise. Have a safe Memorial day.
Samantha & Tigger

Monica said...

Yao-lin, wow is all I can say. What a list that is. I especially like how you have your people trained to carry you to your food. I think maybe you should start a people training school.

The Meezers or Billy said...

Fank you for tagging us Yao-lin! We will play on Tuesday!!

we is shur that you is smarter than efurryone we has efurr knowed!

The Fluffy Tribe said...

ahahahahahahahaha you are SO bad Yao-lin. We are impressed. Mom laughed really hard at the part about you being banned from yer Grammies house ~poiland tribe

Mr. Hendrix said...

Yao-lin, you're the quintesential kitty. Love it. I think the IQ test was rigged so Mao's feelings won't be hurt.
I'm loving that you took the burger from your grandma's hand. I'm lucky in that my grandbeans spoil me even more than my beans. They don't even yell at me when I scratch stuff. That is the life. Perhaps your beans need to train your grandma on your greatness???

Angel Junior, Orion and Sammy said...

Oh Yao, you are incorrigible! I want to be just like you!

Forty Paws said...

Wow! That is so cool how you destroyed your grandmum's house! Way to go!

Luf, Us